here's this whole life experience that
happens when you move out and earn your place in the world on your own merit.
It kind of instills a sense of confidence and humility in you - to know that
you've survived the cold of the world, but to also know how susceptible you are
to losing everything if you drop your guard. It gives you a certain empathy
toward your fellow man (who have survived the same trials you have), and makes
you very grateful for what the world hasn't yet taken from you.
You lose your arrogance and your pride
after you've weathered that storm, and you gain an instinct for acknowledging
that core strength in others that you meet. It's this unspoken connection that
links you to other people who have chosen (or been forced to) bare the weight
of the world on their shoulders.
They make it work. They find a
way. They do what needs to be done. And they ALWAYS help others - because
there's no one else who can. It's a right of passage that results in you
turning from a boy into a man.
And then there's the kind of person. Who
has never earned anything for himself, or tried to weather the storm on his
own. He's a child. A little child crying and complaining that his mother's milk
is too cold.
You know what the difference between
arrogance and confidence is, on a practical level? Arrogant people derive their
delusions of superiority from an absence of failure - stemming from a lack of
life experience. Confident people derive their value from their determination
to persist after discovering that failure (and success) is an unavoidable
symptom of life itself.
Arrogant men think there are 2 kinds of
people in the world: Winners and losers, and they look down on losers for being
inferior. Confident men know that the only 2 kinds of people are those who are
both winners AND losers (because they choose to persist), and those who are
neither (because they are too afraid of failure to even try).
An arrogant guy in his life. He lives a
sheltered life, being supported by others. His lack of life experience has
resulted in a lack of failure, which has convinced him that he is superior to
others who HAVE failed (when in fact they have had the balls to actually TRY at
life, whereas he has not). He is cruel and uncaring because he has not seen how
cruel and uncaring the world can be without his aid. He is nothing but a child.
I don't pity him or feel anger toward
him. But one day he's going to be disconnected from his life lines, and he'll
have to make his own way. And when that day comes he's going to have a lot of
ground to cover. Those first 6-12 months are going to be hell for this guy.
He's going to see how little the world values him or his angsty demeanor. His
ego and his confidence are going to be absolutely thrashed, and all that will
be left is a humble, hurt child struggling not to die cold and alone, crying
under a bridge.
If he lacks character he'll move back in
with his parents, living out the rest of his life shifting between a state of
traumatic realization that he's worthless, and moments of vengeance, where he
takes out his frustration toward the world that hurt him by destroying the
confidence of others who have the misfortune of crossing his path.
If, underneath all of that childish,
arrogant hatred, he possesses character, he might make himself into someone
worthy of respect. I hope he is forced to see himself like that one day, and I
hope he struggles through his hardships, grows, and earns a place along side
the rest of us who keep the world turning.
Until that day comes though, he's just a
symbol for who we could all be if we hadn't made the effort to keep earning,
fighting, or providing. He's a living, breathing, cautionary tale.
Do not allow yourself to stagnate.
P.S.
I guess actually putting that all into
words has made me actually think about this. I want to stress one thing here:
The world -IS- cruel, cold, and uncaring. Which is why it's so important for us
who can survive in it to choose not to be.
When you grow up and go out on your own,
you see flashes of that cruelty. Some people hide from it. Some people move
back in with their family. Some people lie to them self about it. Some
people rage against it.
But some people accept it as a fact of
life. They accept that there will never be a shelter for them, or a place of
warmth and compassion. So they build that place for others. Because it should
exist for some of us, whether the world thinks so or not.
There is nothing as sweet in this life
as being able to live in a world where you are loved, safe, and provided for,
surrounded by friends and family. That world does not exist naturally. It is an
illusion. Which is why it is up to you to create it. You weather the storm for
others. You provide shelter for others. You allow others to live in ignorance
of the world's cruelty. You do this because no one else can.
(anonymous) Reddit Contributor
